February 2, 2018

Is de cookie crumbling?

Par-Liar-mint sitting on Wednesday was ah great day foh De-muck-we-see. It was all pull-it-tek-all strategy.De No Con-fee-dense Vote tabled by de Awe-Position was going to expose de Go-venom-mint at ah time when ah lot ah negative things have been making d headlines, also dat more-shun, if it was allowed would ah put an anti-climax to Fine-ants Minister Calm-me-Low’s first Budget presentation come next Monday. So de Go-venom-mint had to shut it down wid an amendment, knowing dat de Amendment would be heard before de No Con-Fee-Dense More-shun and de NDP would be foolish not to walk-out! Ah must big-up Sir Louis one ah de senior statesman in de house. Sir Louis is full of good will and kind humour. Wednesday saw him demanding his due respect. He had to remind de house, though Lie-Ze say he too full of himself, dey boasting bout his passing Exams and getting credentials in Par-liar-men-tree procedure. Lie Za say dat de good thing ‘bout Sir Louis is: “ He knows, dat he Knows Not dat he knows Not!”

But thanks to Jomo Thomas, Speaker of de House foh letting de Motion and counter-Motion on Wednesday develop into ah very informative Debate. May I remind all dat Jomo is ah Pure-Boy from Murray Village, he is not ah “Yes Man” like de former Speaker, ah not calling his name foh people to say “nah bad talk yuh family!” Everybody overs dat Speaker Jomo’s Fair and Fearless writing in his Weekly Newspaper Column “Plain Truth” is laden wid Red Ants dat biting left right and sent-her. So when Wednesday’s Sitting in de House broke down into ah Back-Canal Brawl, all who had dey Acts to grind to cut-up Jomo, took turn one after de other. Finance Minister Calm-me-Low, who looks ah bit “under de weather,” was an exception, he displayed maturity and earnestly wanted to assist in de De-bait. But dat didn’t change de command; is like de word was already out: “get Jomo!”

Senator Carlos James was first off de block. Lie-Za is one ah de Senator’s fans, she say is like de Senator feels he should be de Speaker, and his outburst in de House reminds her of de day she was eaves-dropping, when one ah dem said in de Speaker’s presence “##youareahnobody.”

But de biggest statement in de House was made by Minister of Agriculture Sir-Bow-Toe Sees-her: “Mister Speaker… de Prime Minister wid due respect …does not have de Moral or Legal Authority to speak on Sir Bow-Toe Sees-Her behalf on any matter anytime or anyplace.” Lie-Za love it, she say Sir Bow-Toe darn right! Yuh think it easy dat after trying foh years to impersonate de Come-Red wid his Vice oops, Voice… trying to sound like de Come-Red, in his act-shun twisting and twirling while speaking and even copying his Man-ah-raise-him; so much so dat people were already saying how Sir Bow-Toe is de next Black Ralph, only to see Calm-me-Low handed de most senior ministerial position of Finance. Sir Bow-Toe ain’t got nothing ‘gainst Jomo because dey in de same Cold room, is just dat he like he was “carrying something in his Craw.”

Now if is one time Sir Bow-Toe sound exactly like his Come-Red leader was when he made dat outburst. He carrying ah burden and had to lay it down, and what better place to register his statement of manhood. He was elected on his popularity, no transferring of votes in his Constituency to mek him win. In other words he will not be made to sit in “Dignified Silence” and de people’s business in Par-liar-mint. Is de cookie crumbling? And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.