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His last will and testimony

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De future of SVG lies in de hands of de Youths and we must all salute our young people when dey blossom, even in de dirty game, poly-ticks.. Ah beg to differ from all those who bitching about Calm-Low moving another step up de Pull-it-tek-all Ladder.

He is ah bright young man, impresses me as someone who reads ah lot and is on top of things. Left to Ralph alone he will be de next PM. De same could be said of Sober-too, ah bright young man, an Island Scholar, two University Degrees including. Ah hope Dun-all Trump could see him in de night. Oh oooh!

Lie-Za sees Calm-Low’s appointment as a turning point in our Finances and de E-con-amy. She says dat Sober-too’s “F” in Banana and Cess Mek-he’s “FF” one each in Sports and Culture, are no worse dan de PM’s “F” in Finance. Lie-ZA betting dat dey will be no de-fist-hit in Calm-Low’s Budget in 2018.

Sober-too got to be hirt, how he was full of NRG initially, was obsessed in becoming Ralph Gonsalves successor; talk like Ralph and sounded more like Ralph dan Ralph himself; den Solomon appeared and not even his father, David knew he was in de Palace as Solicitor General. Dat’s how it is, Pastor does always Christen he pick-me first, before dey even born.

Finally, she said dat she heard our Prime Minister announcing succession plans like when man anticipate Pull-it-tek-ill death, Ralph meking his Last Will and Testimony like if he got ah Title Deed foh SVG. So ah reminded her of de Parable of de Rich Fool. He anticipated ah bumper crop dat year, so he broke down de existing barns and built bigger ones. “I will have plenty of grains and things stored up foh years, Ah will take life easy, eat, drink and be merry,” he boasted. Dat same night when he went to bed, he herd de Lord’s voice: “You Fool, dis very night you life will be demanded from you!”

PROMOTION FOH PC KEITH BARNETT

Years ago ah read ah story about ah lickle youthman who dwell in ah small coastal village in Holland. De village was prone to frequent coastal flooding, so de community was very protective of de sea-wall dat was built along de water-front. On his way home from school, de observant lickle fellar, noticed ah hole as big as his fist in de sea-wall and water was beginning to seep thru. Straight away de youth reasoned dat by night-fall when de real high tides come in, dat poor-key-hole oops, ‘tiny-hole’ would become ah ‘man-hole’ and by den it would ah bin too late, de wall would be gone and so too de village. He took off his shirt, wrapped it around his fist and plug de hole and waited till help came. De story had ah pleasant ending as de entire village came out and secured de wall and saved de community. Needless to say, de youthman was showered wid praise foh saving his community.

Having said dat, ah want to congratulate Police Constable Keith Barnett who was off-duty, but rushed to de assistance of an “unknown” man (ah Tourist), of an “unknown” address (far-reign), who was robbed of his “unknown” possession (ah gold chain). Lie-Za say dat wid such unknown rubbish, de Mad-is-straight might be obliged to impose an “unknown” fine on de accused.

But PC Keith Barnett, like de lickle Dutch-boy, might just have salvaged dis country’s good name from being placed on another Black List, again. Last week, SVG’s name was in Offshore Bank Corrupt-shun scheme, Man-e-Fort’s money comes hey one day, laundered de same day, and exported de next evening. How dare all yuh say SVG tainted in Money Laundering. Ah hope Officer Barnett belongs to de Party so he could get ah well deserved promotion. And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.

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