Go Organ-Ache Nay-Shun-Wide

Ah wish Vax-scene was around when ah was growing up, because nothing passed me. From de common Colds, Fever, Measles, Chicken Pox, to Glass Pox. In Form 2 ah had Mumps – two big lumps on either side of my jaw. Mumps was supposed to be highly contagious, but none ah my classmates caught it; Back den ah was consoled dat those diseases appeared once in yuh lifetime. Yun never get dem twice. True to form none a dem ever came back to get me.

Lately ah was reading an article dat our immune system played an important role to fight off every one ah dem diseases and does de wuk of any Vax-scene. Dat our immunization factory was constructed around our one-dah-full Die-at, rich in our Organic Foods, natural Vitamin B12 and Oh-me-gar 3 (de number is now Oh-me-gar12) and plenty exercise, “run-up-and-down. Ah figured de author of dat article was joking because dey was nothing name Organic Foods, B12 or Oh-me-gar 3 in de drug stores back den… Now ah talking ‘bout 70 years ago, eh.

So what Organ-ache foods did our parents give us dat contained natural B12 and Oh-me-gar 3? “Whale Oil, Black Fish Oil, Coconut Oil, Cotton Seed oil, colourful fruits, mango foh tea, breakfast and dinner; Nuff Organ-ache provision, Breadfruit and Bananas, Yams, Dasheen, Eddoes, Sweet Potatoes, dark Green Vegetables Callalo; Spin-age, Okra. Farine and Our-Root, Bush Tea and foh rash and sores dey washed our skin wid Kojo Root and Corilla. Lie-Za say dey gave her Love Vine in pipe water to drink foh Jaundice.

But thank God foh Vax-scene. When my second set ah kids, my Raw-toon crop came along, dey was more Vax-scenes dan viruses, including all those in my time, plus some new diseases. All kind ah out-breaks came and went, but de Vax-ah-nay-shun wuk, dey were immune. Unfortunately dey was no Vax-scene to administer foh bad-behave-yah, apart from de leather strap.

So dis brings me to de topic of de day, dis new Vax-scene foh another killer-monster: “Human Papilloma Virus” or HPV said to be de main cause of Cervical Cancer, ah killer in young women! My interest is layman’s curiosity, but Lie-Za has her own issues. She read in de papers way local medical officials here are saying dat Cervical Cancer takes 20 to 30 years to manifest itself, but in de same breath dey sayng dat de Vax-scene has been available foh only de last ten years, yet dey saying for certain dat de Vax-scene prevents de transmission of HPV, de cause of Cervical Cancer. Come better dan dat doctors! Maybe parents in doubt should not just condemn de Vax-scene outright, dey’s lots ah info about HPV and de Vax-scene on numerous Web-sites dat dey could visit and be better informed.

Years ago, Lie-Za got ah scare when ah Medical Doctor told her dat young women, (including raped infants) involving in sexual intercourse wid multiple partners, stand a higher risk of developing Cervical Cancer. So is only fair dat men found guilty of raping infants should get 30 years in jail.

After all de ole style, she has made up her mind wid ah list of pre-conditions. But she will tek de Vax-scene and just in case of any side effects, she will build up her immune system by going on de ole time Die-at, rich in Vitamin B12 and Oh-me-gar 3! Second she joining ah gym and exercise every day??? Thirdly, she going back to her church: no Sex! total abstinence Lie-Za???. Den she say ah must tell Go-venom-mint all dem Viruses are caused by de poisonous chemicals we using as manure. Go Organ-ache nay-shun-wide. And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.