Shelley and Rose-Marry

Last weekend was kind-ah hectic. First was de Norma Keizer Scholarship Foundation (NKSF) dinner on Sat-dey Night; Church Service early on Sunday Morning till mid-day; by de time ah finished lunch ah was off to ah surprise Celebration on Sunday afternoon. De whole thing started about ah month ago when ah lovely young lady whom ah recognized, handed me ah strangely worded invitation. She told me to read it and ah will figure out way-ah-go-on. Basically we were being invited to join de Celebration at de Octagon in Diamond on Sunday, July 10 at 4:00 p,m. no name, dat’s it!{{more}} De only clue was de bearer. Ah couldn’t figure it out, so ah called Lie-Za foh help. She asked de obvious question: “Who brought de Invitation?” Ah told her: “Shelley Clarke’s wife!” We almost got into an argument when she said: “ Shelley ain’t married, like he finally getting married to Rose.” Lie-Za carried on and on how Shelley and Keith Joseph, (Sports Columnist at de NEWS) like “peas in ah pod!” Den she reminded me how Keith, at his wedding apologized to his wife’s parents foh years ah courtship, saying all dat over, no more “just another look!” So ah told her dat in as much as Shelley loves ah News story, he loves his privacy as well, so we go stay silent till after July 10. Invitation or not we crashing dat wedding; Ah want to hear Shelley’s speech when he replies to all de heckling we got put up foh him.

Ah got dey after 5:00, in time to witness de exchanging of de rings and de signing and so on. Officiating was Father Ulric Jones, de faithful. Interestingly Father Jones officiated at de NKSF Dinner de night before. Shelley was in mild shock (surprised) when ah flashed de Camera on him, he gave me ah short-lived smile as if to say: “Man Bassy ah invited yuh and yuh wife, but why did yuh have to bring along yuh Camera!”

Photographs taken, drinks flowing, up comes de MC, de other “peas in de pod;” de man Keith himself. As was expected, eloquence took centre stage. He started off well, requested dat de Sham-pain be served; he congratulated de newly-weds, and wid ah mischievous grin, told us dat he and his wife were celebrating ah sixth Anniversary on de day. Foh Keith dat was ah double whammy, killing two birds wid one stone. Den he broke de sad news dat dey will be no speechifying, de Groom will however say ah few words. We were deflated like when all four tyres went flat, no chance to heckle de Groom.

Ah sumptuous buffet dinner was served, then de Celebrations switched into Carry-yuh-key mood. Kaisonian Strongy who is fear-most foh his robust lyrics, gave ah strong rendition of de Trade Winds song: “De Honey Moon Couple.” Ah song dat tells de story about someone who eavesdropped on de couple packing to go on honey-moon. Some very acrobatic movements, de husband was asked to go on top, widout success, den dey wife was asked to try, same result; well when all else failed, dey both decided to try doing it pon top. De story-line captured Shelly’s undivided attention; he looked relieved at de end of de song, de couple was only trying to close dey suitcase.

Finally de climax of de Celebration was struck when Mr and Mrs Clarke chose not to dance, too many people have been stepping on his corns lately; so dey both Rose, took de microphones and carry-dey-key to Shania Twain’s: “Still de one I love”: De opening verse covered it all: “Looks like we’ve made it, Look how far we’ve come my baby; We mighta took de long way; we knew we’d get dey some day!” De crowd exploded foh dem lyrics and foh Shelley who hardly ever speaks much less sing. Nuff blessings as Shelley and Rose-Marry.

WATCH OUT FOH DAT STORM

De Norma Keizer Scholarship Fund (NKSF) dinner went down well. Good food and plenty too, lots ah ent-icing desserts and is so dem charmingly chubby folks went on de attack. Dey was live Music to soot de occasion and age group, provided by “Link,” ah new band wid ole musicians, it’s like Ole wine in New Bottle! Ah was asked to do ah Chinese Auction and ah still can’t get over way go down. We sold chits in packages of $5, $10 and $20. All bids were placed in ah bag and someone was asked to pull ah winner. Would yuh believe dat de first Draw, ah Sankey DVD Player, Storm Gonsalves won; De Second Draw, an Alcatel One Touch Tablet computer, guess who won? Storm Gonsalves again! Third Draw ah decided dat dey will be no “Four in ah Row” tonight. When de lady hand went into de bag, yuh could ah hear ah pin drop. Ah mek de sign ah de cross and say three Hail Mary and Dr Ibrahim won the GMC Electric Hammer Drill! Ah got news foh NDP people who frighten foh Calm-Low, he is de Calm before de Storm! It was ah lovely evening, folks enjoyed demselves, and de Foundation is in ah better position to meet its 2016/2017 scholarship commitments. Thanks all. And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.