Labour love! Labour hug! Labour pig!

Give Jack-he-Jah-kit, de Come-red score big time last week Thursday when four private planes landed at Argyle. Wid all fear-ness, ah remember hearing on de News dat ah plane will land at de Argyle International Airport to test de Lights, but nobody said whether it was “Light of Day” which is irreconcilable, or Plane “Day-light or Night-light.” So it took my girl Lie-Za to figure it all out, she say it was Light Aircrafts dat landed!{{more}} Big-up Jon-ah-ton Palmer, man wid ah ton ah years flying and an authority on flying Light Aircrafts, ah remember about four years ago, when ah asked him about any perceivable problems foh Light Aircrafts landing at Argyle; “None at all” he said and he promised me dat he will be de first to land ah plane out dey. Ah man to his word, he did so quite safely. My grouse about Argyle still stands, and dat is de pull-it-to-kill prop-ah-gang-dah, why do dey keep announcing completion dates dat are never met, mainly because we don’t have de ready money to finish de darn thing.

But on de other hand, money does not seem to be ah problem. Not when building materials costing millions ah tax payers dollars are being distributed daily to ULP Supporters foh votes! Dat will ex-plane de Jailhouse Madness taking place daily at de Ole PWD Storeroom. De Two-two hit de fan last Choose-dey at about 8:30 a.m. when commuters were given ah timely reminder of Road Block 2000 all over again. Call dis one “Road Block 2015” as 32 big Trucks held up traffic at Arnos Vale foh over an hour, de road was blocked from de ole Public Works compound over to de exit at de E.T. Joshua Airport, trucks rushing to load building materials to be distributed to ULP supporters. What better Calm Pain investment dan to subject yuh supporters in captivity to ah level ah poverty way dey will exchange dey franchise foh materials! Hard wuking Banana Farmers and other willing wukers have been made poor under dis administration, dey’s no Banana weekly income and no work to fill dat source, correct-shun, dey’s wuk, two weeks before Christmas every year; and one month before Elect-shun every five years! So wid ah lickle cash in de hand and ah few pieces ah timber, plywood and galvanize sheets, man is back to de singing: “Clap Hands foh Papa, when Papa come, Papa bring Sugar Plum!”

Lie-Za calls it ULP Madness! She piggy back on Bishop Gordon’s line to his Parishioners reminding dem dat “Elect-shun time is de Crazy Season.” But Bishop Jason Gordon is not one to let “ Satan steal his Testimony” he will live up to his God guide conscience. Dat is one fearless, Servant of God who impresses me dat he is not in de Ministry foh material gains. Of course dey are other Clergymen who are not prepared to suck-up to Caesars foh lucre foh dem-selves and dey family. Interestingly Bishop Gordon is Cat-licks like Ralph, but one gets de feelings dat Ralph is distancing himself from his original Church where he once received Communion and made Confess-shun. But Freedom to worship is ah man’s Right. Lie-Za notes how de high-rocky in de Safe Sold Religion, now more sophisticatedly renamed Pentecostals and Evangelicals sucking-up toto ah point of surrender to de PM and it bother her.

But Bishop Jason Gordon remains de John de Baptist of today. John was not afraid to tell de Pry-minister sorry de King. Herod Antipas dat he was sleeping wid women other dan his wife, sorry again, me head bad, dat he Antipas was wrong to tek way and marry Herodias, his brother’s wife, John was put in Jail and later beheaded. My prayer is dat these Johnny come lately Safe Sold Bishops will repent foh dey silence and speak out against de ills committed by men in high places in our society. Lie-Za has her own Prayuer, she wants to live to witness when God begins to let loose Bull-wood pon dem so called Men of de Cloth.

AH WANT AH PIECE AH PORK

De Slogan is “Labour Love You” and ah love it. Dey Hog-in de show sharing out lands, dey share out lumber to continue de house, note ah say continue, de house will be finished next time around. Dey will be no repeat ah de 2009 ‘Faux pas” where no materials were given out foh de Riff-around-dem; but dat mistake was corrected in de 2010 General Elect-shuns when Phase One materials to start de house was shared out, in 2015 Phase Two is now being distributed! So dey have house and land. Mor Hog-in as some six thousand sacks ah fertilizer is being distributed to Farmers and Far-mas. De latest Hog-in is dat Pigs are being distributed. Ah asked Lie-Za way dey get all these Pigs to share out, she wid she out-ah-place self say: “Labour Hogs finally deliver Piglets!” Teasing her ah bit ah told her: “Dat is real Labour Love!” As sharp as ever she said: “Oh No! dat is de Come-red Pork-Love, you don’t know is Pork-he-Love?” Ah boy, her tongue is as unclean as de Pork!

Now dey’s an Elect-shun in twelve day’s time. Please go and Vote and be guided by conscience. And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.