Ah gary-foh-una black woe-man

First to begin, ley me deliver Lie-Za’s message. After de Arm-in Initiative, she has now found herself ah man from Belize. His name is Gary, his mother’s name is Una so Lie-Za refers to him as Gary-foh-Una.

Secondly, ah don’t know way get in me head in de Column last week, to tek Black Stalin’s Kodos and give dem to Mighty Chalkdust. Was de Black Stalin and not Chalky who sang “De more Africans dey kill de more Africns keep coming.” Thanks to de brothers Bert John and Delpesche, both Gary-foh-Una Black-men to de bone foh pointing out my mistake{{more}}

But ah resent de way dem “Local Gary-foh-Una Black Boys” pon de ruling party Raid-yuh Stay-shun, also some Gary-foh-Una Black Woe-men pon Fierce Book beating up pon we very own “Lickle Gary-foh-Una Black We-men,” hey in SVG, seems like ah will have to pray foh Stalin’s complete and quick recovery so he could write Volume 2 of “Black Man Come Out To Party” call dis one “Gary-foh-Una Black Man Get Out Dah Party.” Dis is ah Rare-sis thing ‘cause ah don’t hear White Woe-men in SVG or any-way beating up pon dey own White Woe-men so. Yet we come-plain dat more We-men need to get involved in we dutty pull-ah-tricks. Whenever one ah we young Gary-foh-Una Black Girl tek ah step forward, once is not in support ah de Guv-ah-mint, is just endless verbal abuse aimed at destroying de ladies, to stop dem in de tracks. De list is long, check it out, starting from Mammy Josh, Yvonne Francis-Gibson, Kay Bacchus, Nickle Silver-star ah praying foh yuh Nickle; G-knee, V-net, Loose-it, An-easier, Me-shell Ann-juice, Kate; dis week, Radio personality, La Fun “Gypsy” Phillips is de target.

Ah remember Gypsy way back in 1996, ah “Lickle Gary-foh-Una Black Girl” from country come town to perform pon Peace Mo stage during de Secondary School’s Drama Festival. She was one of my wife’s drama students at de St Joseph Convent Marriaqua Secondary School (SJCM). Skarpian, ah former Kaiso King wid “Ah Lickle Black Boy” story too, was among dem in de Drama Group. My wife reminds me dat de product-shun was “Good Morning Miss Millie,” way Gypsy and Skarpian were supposed to be having ah relay-shun-ship, but Skarpian, de shy lickle fellar back den, couldn’t handle Gypsy, he kept complaining dat she was over acting. On de evening of de Semi Finals, ah whispered to Gypsy dat she performed well. Wid her saucy lickle self and wid-out even knowing she was in de presence of Jimmy Prince, one ah de judges, she blurted out loudly: “Thanks, but me ah go win Best Actress!” Dat year SJCM school won most of de individual Awards: Odingo Jackson won Best Actor, Best Supporting Actor went to Skarpian and Best Actress went to Gypsy. What is I-run-ache, is dat last Sat-dey Night almost 20 years after dat event, Gypsy was on de NDP platform at Richland Park using her drama skills to convince de crowd why dey should never vote foh Jimmy Prince.

Two years later she represented SVG at de Caribbean Secondary School’s Drama Festival in Guyana and again won Best Actress. But Gypsy did not bury her talent at all, she found herself ah job at NICE Radio on air “Cutting Dix” like ah Yankee. Den in 2002/3 dey was ah National Agricultural Exhibition, ah was asked to be ah judge at de Miss Agriculture Queen Show, one ah de feature attraction. Ah smiled when de MC announced Contestant No 4, Miss La-Fun Phillips. She was well made up and looked quite charming, even though de criteria was about Folklore, Gary-foh-Una ting, talent and speech present-a-shun, not about pretty face and swim wear. Gypsy stole de hearts ah de crowd as well as de judges including yours truly, and was crowned Miss Agriculture. To date, dey has not been another National Agriculture Exhibition since dat time, so Gipsy is still de raining Miss Agriculture, all be it Queen of ah ailing Agriculture Die-nasty.

De effervescent Gypsy was awarded one ah de Tie-One Knees Scholarship in 2006 way she earned her Bachelor’s Degree. Interestingly, now dat she has declared her pull-it-to-kill hand, ah hearing lots of non-scents about ULP gave her scholarship and how she ungrateful, dah’s Unadulterated Fee-sees! Dat schol was all Tie-One-Knees tax-payers money. In 1969 Cato’s Labour Party was in office when ah was awarded ah CIDA Scholarship, paid in full wid Canadian taxpayers money. Mitchell willingly signed my Bond. Ah have been back opposing Cato, Joshua, Mitchell and Ralph primarily on Prince-Apples, and ah challenge anyone to tell me ah ungrateful because ah was given ah Go-venom-mint Schol.

Ah chose to hi-light Gypsy because she is ah climber, ah winner, best of all ah Woe-man, ah young Gary-foh-Una Black Woe-man. One ah these days ah Woe-man will be Prime Minister, An-Easier, Kate or maybe de same Gypsy, but ah Woe-man and hopefully ah Gary-foh-Una Black Woe-man, so ah begging dem booth-lickers pon de Party Raid-yuh Stay-shun and Fierce Book, to respect our Black Woe-men, nah wait till dey become Prime Ministers to go lick dey boots. Lie-Za say ah should get Gypsy, ah former T’n’T Kaiso Monarch to re-write one of his big songs “de Lickle Black Boy” but call it “de Lickle Gary-foh-Una Black Girl!”

And wid dat, is gone ah gone again!

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.