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My husband has been abusing me since I said ‘I Do!’

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Hi Rosie,

I am a young mother with three kids, all under four years old. I am also married and my husband has been abusing me from the time I said “I do”. He said to me that now we are married I have to answer to him and he is my boss. He yells at me, calls me all sorts of nasty names, teaches our two-year-old son to call me names, because “men are bosses over women”, and he has started to push me lately, especially when he has been drinking after work.

Rosie, I want out. I know he will try to find me and take the kids, but I can’t take it. Even my family doesn’t know the hell I’ve been going through for the last five-and-a-half years. Help me, please, it’s killing me.

My dear friend,

You must take action immediately!! This is not emotionally healthy, nor is it physically safe! In my opinion you are in an increasingly dangerous and toxic situation, where he is focusing his abuse on you. This is not acceptable at all.

I would quickly get your family and support system up to speed regarding what has been happening behind the scenes. I would also document in pictures if you had any unfortunate physical bruises etc. Then finally, find a safe place to go, get into some serious counselling, all while seeking legal advice regarding your next steps about your marriage.

Please note I didn’t start off with “you should talk to him”. I think you are in a highly sensitive and increasingly dangerous situation. So securing your safety and that of your children becomes top priority right now. You will have to make some very difficult decisions in your near future, just make sure you have ample support for those rocky days ahead.

Good luck

Rosie

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