My boyfriend slapped me and burst my lip; should I stay?

Hi Rosie,

I am 16 years old and I have been with my boyfriend for the last two years. Everything was good for a long time and then I heard he had another girl from another school.

Rosie, the thing is, when I asked him, he got mad and hit me so hard that he burst my lip. I had to lie to my mother and tell her it happened during netball practice. He did that about six months ago and said he was sorry, that he didn’t mean to hit me and he wouldn’t do it again. He hasn’t hit me again, but when he gets angry he would start cursing and sometimes he pushes me.{{more}} I also saw the girl he is seeing and we have had words too. I really love him, Rosie, but I don’t like how he treats me. If I ever tell my brother what he’s doing, he would go after him. They play soccer together and are good friends, so I am trying to keep the peace. He says that he doesn’t want me to leave and that the other girl is just a friend. Should I give him another chance and stay? He is a nice guy Rosie.

Help me

Dear Help Me,

If you didn’t say that you were 16, this letter sounds like it came from a grown woman in an abusive relationship! Why are you putting yourself through this nonsense at this young age? You are 16, and should not be going through this type of deep and toxic relationship! No woman should have to go through this period.

Look, do you see how you are making excuses for him? He hasn’t hit me again, but he curses me and pushes me? That is ABUSE my love! Say, “NO” to that type of treatment. When you are hiding how you are getting bruises from your family – you ARE in an abusive relationship. Look, please leave this relationship; both of you shouldn’t be together and this is what is called a toxic relationship. It would also seem as though he has seen this type of behaviour from someone close to him and will have to work on this on his own.

Meanwhile, please remember that you are only 16 with a whole lifetime of promise ahead of you. Don’t start a legacy of being in abusive relationships; you really don’t need this type of drama! Get some counselling, because you need some guidance and encouragement to re-route yourself to a positive path, one that has you finishing school, going to college, getting a great job and having a successful, loving, safe and happy relationship. Walk away from this drama, please, and seek some counselling.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.