He has stopped taking my calls

Hey Rosie,

I am pregnant and almost ready to give birth. The problem is my baby’s father; he is not in our lives anymore. Rosie, I really want him, but he keeps rejecting me. He was in prison for two years and I remained faithful to him. Everyone told me to get a life and move on, but I wouldn’t listen. So I stuck by him and waited faithfully for him to be released.{{more}} I should mention that I am 24 and I put my education on hold. I would send him money to buy stuff in jail, go and visit him (he was in another state) and always take his calls. Then as the time came closer for him to be released, I found out that he had another girl doing pretty much the same things for him as well. I was really hurt, and my parents and siblings told me that I was an idiot to have been with him to begin with. But Rosie I forgave him. When he came out of prison, I went down and got him, brought him back to where I lived, and even got an apartment for us, even though I don’t make much and he couldn’t work. I really wanted us to start our new life together, so I was happy when I became pregnant after 2 months. The messed up thing is that he ran back out of state and left us soon after. Rosie, why would he do me like this? I still love him. and can’t get over this. He wouldn’t take my calls. I am having a high risk pregnancy, and my Mom isn’t happy with me either. Should I fight for this relationship?

Help Me Please!

Dear Help Me Please,

I am just here shaking my head at your situation. You had an uncomplicated life, but that was too simple for you, huh? So even though you knew that this situation was going to end badly and against all the protests from your family you went ahead and stayed with this guy? I am truly confused. Why would you do that? Perhaps you struggle with low self-esteem and think this is the best that you can do? Well, I am here to tell you that you are wrong.

First off, he was in jail. So obviously he was convicted of some criminal activity. Why would you want to build a relationship right out the gate with someone who was in lock down for two years? Then you found out that he had another woman (at least one other) who was being played like you. It hurt you, but you STILL forgave him! Then even though your family tried to stop you from making this big mis-step in your life, you went blindly along with this terrible plan.

At this point, you are with child. We need you to become a stable, well rounded and confident mother/role model. I do not doubt that you can become this person, but you are going to need some intensive therapy to figure out why you make the choices you do. Look, let this guy go, focus your energy in taking care of you and the baby. Keep reminding yourself that you deserve better than what you have accepted so far. May you have the strength and the fortitude to be the very best mother to your little one, I know you can, once you seek professional help.

All the best for 2012 to you and your little one.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.