I am in love with my best friend’s brother

Hey Rosie,

I live in Barbados and I’ve been reading and enjoying your column for over a year now, and I want to tell you keep up the good job.{{more}}

I need your help. I am 22 and finishing up University in Management, I have some great parents and some supportive friends. The problem is that I’m in love with one of my best friends brothers. The real issue is that he only turned 18 this year, Rosie! We’ve been liking one another for about 10 months now ( when he was 17). We kept it on the down low so no one would find out. But now he’s 18 and going into his final year of A’levels, he wants us to tell everyone! Rosie, I’m scared. I think my Bestie will turn on me and my parents will be disappointed as well. I love him, but I don’t know if I can face the firing squad. Help me, please.

Afraid and in love



Dear Afraid and in love,

I am afraid for you, too! Wow! This is really is different, and that’s putting it mildly. Your love affair with your best friend’s brother crosses and blurs many lines here, so let’s take a look.

You are 22, smart and almost finished with your education. He’s 18, just became legal and trying to finish Community College. You have been seeing him behind everyone’s back since he was 17. Therefore, lending another layer of “spice” to this very secret relationship. Finally, your Boo has come into his “manhood” and wants to let the world know about his Secret Lover, no matter the consequences! Lord help you both!

My question to you is: Do you really love this young man enough to face the fallout from your friend and some of your family? He is very young, very young. He may be one of the nicest people out there, but I think he’s also caught up in the whole secret romance thing, so he also doesn’t realize that this can have a serious backlash, especially on you.

Let’s look at you. What is it about this young man (I really wanted to say child) that made you think it was okay to start dealing with him on this level? You are in college meeting other guys your age, why this one? Do men your own age intimidate you? Is it easier to have a relationship with a person you can perhaps control or mold? These are questions that you should ask yourself. It will help you moving forward about your own life.

Your parents may be shocked or even say some hurtful things to you, so be prepared. Your girlfriend may not be so forgiving because the whole behind the back thing may really tick her off. Then his age! I can’t tell you what to do, but you should really try to prepare yourself for the backlash. I really do wish you the best with your choices moving forward. I hope they are sound ones.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or P.O Box 152,

Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.