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I left my boyfriend for someone else’s man

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Hey Rosie,

I am a 17 years old and have been living overseas for two years now. First, I want to say who you love doesn’t always love you back, but who really loves you, you don’t love them.

I am in love with this guy who is so handsome. The first time I met him was on Facebook. I never thought he would be so sweet face-to-face.{{more}} I gave him my number and he called me, but he told me he is living with his baby mother, and I said okay.

He came to see me where I was living, and I never thought I would love someone so much. But the point is he is living with his baby mother and she will always be there no matter what.

He told me he loves me and loves her, so I told him he can’t be in love with two beautiful young ladies. He told me it can work, as long as she doesn’t find out.

When we started to spend time together and got much closer, I told him I have a boyfriend, but I am going to end things with my boyfriend. He asked me how long I would take to do that. I told him one day.

After I told my boyfriend I don’t love him anymore, and I love someone else, he told me no, that can’t be possible. I said goodbye to him and ended the phone call. When we are together now he always makes me smile and laugh, but sometimes when we are there together, his baby mother would call. I always feel sad inside, but I don’t want to show it outside. I gave up my boyfriend for this guy who already has a woman, and now I think I am stupid and dumb to make a desicion like that.

I truly love him and I know he loves me, but sometimes he doesn’t show it the way my ex did. But I can’t do this anymore. I have to let him go, because it’s really bad to take another woman’s man who he is living with. I am tired of thinking I am not the main woman and he is not going to be mine. So if I love him, I have to let him go, and if he comes back he is meant to be mine. But if he doesn’t, it was never meant to be. I really need your help Rosie. I am so confused. Although I am still young, you are not too young to fall in love, but you have to fall in love with the right person.

Love at first sight

Dear Love at First Sight,

I agree you are not too young to fall in love. You are so young to be caught up in this type of drama, and this is directly connected to your age. Love is a real and sometimes volatile emotion. We can’t help who we love and who loves us back. However, knowing who is NOT for you is the most important lesson here.

Why at 17 would you want to be with a dude who has a Baby Mama? Really, why? Your experience reminds us about the saying: “Dropping the bone for the shadow”. You had your own boyfriend, someone who showed you respect and affection it seems. Then up shows Mr. Prettiness. He has a lot of game. He tells you that he can love you and his Baby Mama at the same time (first mistake), once she doesn’t find out. Second mistake was that you went along with this arrangement.

Look, do not put yourself in these positions going forward. Consider whoever that gets to know you on a personal level very lucky to do so. Like the letter last week, let’s not start a horrible habit of being the “side chick”. I am very happy to hear that you have come around on your own to realize that this is no type of relationship for you. I guess you just wanted me to co-sign about your decision and I do 100%. Leave this guy and stop being caught up in his web of lies.

You know my drill, continue with your education, become a part of a healthy social circle, for example, a volunteer group from school. Go out with friends, experience all the wonderful things this life has to offer and think before you act. However, stop playing second fiddle, hold yourself to a much higher standard of behavior, and continue pushing forward to a brighter future.


Send questions to Rosie at: [email protected] or P.O Box 152,

Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.