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Am I doing the right thing?

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Hey Rosie,

First of all, I would like to personnally congratulate you for such fantastic, helpful advice that you have given to many others. Hope you continue, as I look forward to reading your articles every week.

Now down to the point at hand. I am an intelligent, beautiful, 18-year-old, Vincentian female. I am currently in a relationship with my boyfriend. We’ve been together for a couple of months now.{{more}} Please note that he has all that a girl dreams of in a young man, and I am so blessed to have him as my love.

Recently, I have found that a lot of other males (some of them are my friends) are getting ‘too close and in my personnal space’ and telling me that they want me to be their baby mother, offering me drinks and asking me to go out on dates with them and all other sorts of nonsense (I don’t know if it is because they might know who I am in a relationship with, why they trying to get us apart). But my answer is always NO. I know the type of guys that they are and so I don’t associate with them. But my boyfriend still thinks, sometimes, that women cannot be trusted. But I am here to prove him wrong! Although I may have fooled around in the past, I have now decided not to waste my life, but to find the right partner(which I did), get a job (which I am now doing) and settle down, and I think he’s getting to see that now. But still the stress of all the other guys just keeps coming. I don’t want to lose them as friends, but their jealousy is getting to me, and if they continue, I will lock them off completely and keep my head forward, friend or no friend, and I told them that aready.

I told my boyfriend all of this before, because we share problems and we trust each other just to keep it between the two of us. But all he says is that he trusts me to do the right thing, which he knows I always do. But I am asking you now, am I doing the right thing?

Wanting to do the right thing

Dear Wanting to do the right thing,

Wait, wait, wait! Before we get started this week, I am now officially old! You know why? When you said that the new line is: “Hey, Browning, (ok so I am getting creative as well, but you get the gist!) will you be my Baby Momma?” For Real? This is too much! Where are we today that this line is EVER acceptable?

Ok, so I’m back. You do sound very mature and level headed, maybe a little too mature for an 18-year-old. I say this because your approach to your

relationship with your boyfriend seems so much “older” than it should be. Look, I admire that you are an open book with your boyfriend and the fact you want to have open and honest communication with him, but sometimes we may get a little deep and serious. You are ONLY 18!

Yes, guys, are going to step to you and tell you that they like you…that is normal. Yes, girls, are going to do the same to your boyfriend as well (make no mistake about that). Yes, you may see someone who you find attractive from a distance. Yes, you may giggle if a guy gives you a compliment, again normal. Eighteen is the age where all the tools that were given to you come into play; to be able to weed out friends, foes and losers. I say all of this to say, if you are dating your boyfriend, it’s dating…getting to know him on a one and one. At this point, he isn’t your husband. Trust, though very important, flows both ways and is gained over time. So once both of you come to the mutual understanding that you are at the beginning of possibly a strong foundation as partners or even lifelong friends, trust will take over. You can both breathe and enjoy what life has to offer without all this tension.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: [email protected] or P.O Box 152,

Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.

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