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Leave your sister’s man alone


Hi Rosie,

I look forward to reading to your article every week. Your advice is to the point, so maybe you can help me. I’m a Vinci living in the US and I have one sister who is three years older than me. She and I are cool, and do many things together. We go shopping, clubbing, do our hair at the same place and have many of the same circle of friends.{{more}} Now that I’ve graduated college and I’ve been working for the last 18 months, we even went away on vacation to Mexico together. This is where we met this guy. I actually met him first on the trip, then she met him after when we were at a club. This guy is now her boyfriend. He happens to live not far from us in our state. He is also West Indian, educated, fine looking and mad cool to be around. Ok, so the problem is that I want him, Rosie. I think we have more in common. We are a little more adventurous than my sister and would try different things, but she is more conservative. Also, we get along so well. We have the same likes in music and sense of humor. I think he is my soul mate. Don’t get me wrong, he hasn’t stepped to me nor me to him. But I feel as though there is a connection and I would like to explore it. The only thing that’s holding me back is the love for my sis. I date, have many friends, have a great career and I’m 23. What is my problem, Rosie? Can’t get him outta my mind.

Going Nutts

Hello Going Nutts,

Well, let me just stop you right now from going nuts. You can’t have him. Plain and simple. Thank God there is some plain old common sense rolling around in your head there! You hit the nail on the head; he is your sister’s man, not yours. So he is off limits!

What you are suffering from is from “the grass is greener on the other side syndrome”. He has “everything” that you want and that makes you want him more appealing. Then sprinkle a little sisterly rivalry in there and we now have a recipe for some big trouble.

I am so grateful that neither you nor he has crossed that line. But you must be very careful to keep these “romantic” feelings in check. It is not a healthy thing to keep playing with because it will destroy every one who is involved.

Also, realize that your sister’s relationship is working with this young man because they bring different things to the table. They both obviously appreciate their differences and that is why it works. Keep your distance from him and continue to respect and love your sister and most of all your self. You are a bright and articulate young lady. Your Prince Charming is out there just for you alone. So leave any thoughts about your sister’s man. You WILL be burnt.


Send questions to Rosie at: or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.