My pastor tried to fondle me
My problem is that my pastor tried to feel me up and kiss me. I was with him and another woman in the country giving away clothes to elderly people.
He dropped the woman home first, then, he stopped the car and told me that he liked how I am growing up so nice. Next thing I knew, he was trying to touch my breasts and kiss me. I was so frightened that I started to cry. He stopped and said he would take me home.
I donât go back to church there and my mother is always asking why. He is a nasty man, Rosie, and people think he is so good. I know my mother wouldnât believe me. I am 17 and I am still in school.
Help me, Rosie
Dear Help Me,
Thank you for writing me and also allowing me to publish your letter as well. I sometimes get letters that like yours are very important, but for one reason or the other, the person doesnât want it to be published. By sharing our problems, it allows others to realize that they are not the only ones going through a similar situation. So I thank you for coming forward with your personal experience.
Now back to your problem. What a horrible feeling of betrayal you must have felt when this first happened! I can only imagine what went through your young mind. I bet you were so confused and blindsided, because you would never expect this from a âMan of Godâ. You handled your situation very well and I have to say that I am very proud of you.
I understand that you are scared to tell your mother, but I have to let you know that you did nothing wrong. Do you hear me? You did nothing wrong! No one should touch you. No one. Much more a man who claims to lead a congregation in the name of our Lord. I donât want your faith to be shaken or changed as regards who God is in your life. This is a sick person, who did a sick thing to you. But he is not God. Just like you, he is a sinner and struggles everyday to walk in the life and light that our God requires us to do. You must also l Continued from page 27
remember that not every Pastor and Minister is like this. There are many wonderful men and women of the cloth, so do not be discouraged by one who has lost his way.
If you and your mother have a decent relationship I urge you to tell her. I suspect that even though she may be angry about the situation, she would be angry that it happened to you and will not blame you for it. I strongly suspect that this has happened to other women as well, who may be too embarrassed to talk about it, but by reading this will realize that they are not alone.
You are a brave young woman. I really want to give you credit in coming forward. I want to encourage you to reach out to your mother, if not your mother, maybe an older relative, friend or teacher. You can then talk to them and get this off your chest. You can then begin to heal. I also pray that you can find another church to go to, one where you can praise your God and not feel uncomfortable. Do not allow someone who has issues of his own to stop you from building a spiritual relationship with God. Remember you did nothing wrong and God is a good and merciful God. Keep the faith, my friend.
Send questions to Rosie at: firstname.lastname@example.org or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.
Listen to Rosie live on her show: âHey Rosie Lemme Hear Youâ on the Internet: www.onecaribbeanradio.com, Mondays and Fridays from 1-3 pm.