Hey Rosie!
January 2, 2009

Still in love with my ex!

Hey Rosie,

I am eighteen years old, and since I was in primary school I had a crush on this guy. We became close and began going out. After five years, we broke up because he had sex with my sister; well, that’s what his friends told me. I asked him, but he didn’t tell me yes or no. All he said is if I want to believe that he did it, that it’s all on me.{{more}}

Now I am with this other guy and he treats me real good, but the memories of my ex-lover still linger in me. Most of the time, I worry about my ex-lover more than my boyfriend because I still care about him a lot. I speak to my ex almost everyday. Recently, he broke up with his girlfriend, and I am just wondering whether I should go back with him or stay with my current boyfriend.

Please, I need your help

Dear Please, I need your help,

I have to tell you right off the bat that you are emotionally involved with your ex and you’ve never really let him go.

So, to ask me if you should go back to him is not the issue because you never left him. Emotionally, that is.

You must sit yourself down and ask yourself if you are willing to play second fiddle to any man, no matter how much you may have deep feelings for them. You have to learn to love yourself first, appreciate yourself, before you put another person ahead of yourself.

What troubles me is that there is the possibility he may have slept with your sister (that alone is too much for me). He is not denying this accusation, so that is another disturbing factor. Sexual involvement with a family member and your significant other is never to be taken lightly. This shows a definite lack of respect, making it very taboo overall.

Finally, we must acknowledge the fact that you have a boyfriend, but you can’t stop communicating with your ex. You and only you can decide what your next move should be. However, if you are going to give your ex another chance, please end it decently with your present boyfriend. Do not lead him on and do not play both sides of the fence. Just do the right thing. I also hope you make the best choice for yourself.

Sometimes the grass is not always greener on the other side. Best of luck to you.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.