The Psychology of the forbidden fruit… (part 1)
The thing that we are usually not allowed to have, most times prove to be the thing that we desire most…have you ever noticed this? Or, when things are too easy, or we are sure that we have it in the bag, we end up getting bored or losing interest. This is known as the Forbidden Fruit Effect.
The Forbidden Fruit Effect occurs in every person. It’s a result of man’s desire to learn about the unknown and the consequences of things that are supposed to be dangerous. Generally as human beings, we dislike prohibitions and impositions, as it creates feelings of being imprisoned and restricted; as a result when something is forbidden, it immediately catches our eye and curiosity.
All of a sudden, we’re highly motivated to learn about it, achieve it and explore it. This serves as an affirmation to ourselves that we’re truly free, therefore alleviating our unbearable curiosity.
How do you know something is forbidden?
Through the process of socialization during childhood, our families, the school system and society in general taught us what’s good and bad. They imposed certain limits that should not be crossed, if we did not obey, it was certain that we would endure the negative consequences.
But even amidst the consequences, it was evident that we liked to test the limits we were warned about. This is because the second we realize there’s a dark side, it draws our attention and causes a desire to attempt it.
Overcoming the barriers that the world imposes upon us, provokes a certain sense of pleasure; this is called the “conscious fear.” This means that, although a person is aware of the consequences they could potentially face, they are also aware that they control the situation. So, if need be, they can theoretically stop the adventure and back away. This is what people tend to believe even though it’s not as simple as one might think. However, this sense of control is responsible for a person enjoying the transgression of certain rules or standards.
Our taste for things that are censored, complicated, or bring dangerous consequences, is present in a multitude of situations that we face on a daily basis. Take social relationships, for example.
If a girl or a guy complicates things, it makes them irresistible. But if you realize that they’re in the palm of your hand and are crazy about you, you quickly lose interest.
This tends to happen because that controllable “danger” that makes our adrenaline kick in is no longer present, and causes it to no longer be exciting.
The same is true for infidelities. That tingling sensation that runs through your body when you do something morally incorrect, for some, is very tempting and attractive. Violating the contract you have established with your partner can be dangerous, but knowing you are putting yourself in that danger is the exciting part.
The same thing occurs when you go on certain diets. When you’re told that it’s absolutely forbidden to eat chocolate, drink soda, or consume any other specific food, you will constantly be thinking about that temptation throughout the day, and almost always succumb to it.
(continued next week)