De Love Vine 2010 awe-ward

Ah wish to congratulate all six candidates who received Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth the Second New Year’s Honours. Ah think all six would have contributed in some measure to our development, some more dan some. Granny Rose of “nobody knows de trouble I see” fame was always my pick foh an Award, in particular de FCIB Unsung Hero Award. She has been adopting children abandoned by delinquent parents long before she took up responsibility at de heavily populated YWCA Pre-school and Day Care Centre.{{more}} “Big” daughter, Ferne Cato jokingly talks about de many days she had to divide her lunch, reluctantly giving up her one piece ah chicken dat she left back foh last, to feed ah uninvited, hungry child. Dat never happen to oldah brother Renwick, he always mek sure he eat his meat first ting. Thank you Granny Rose foh caring my grand-daughter and great-grand-son. Which reminds me dat ah have not announced me “Love Vine Awe-wards foh 2010”. Top on my list is ah belated Awe-ward in Research Medicine. Ah keep getting e-mail from Paddy Corea wid info dat was circulating since 2000, about Dr. Albert Lockhart and Dr West foh pioneering research dat turns Ganja into specialty medicines, Canasol, Asmasol and Canavert, Canasol is ah treatment foh Glaucoma, that’s when de intraocular pressure rises to abnormally high levels, sometimes causing blindness; Asmasol is foh asthmatic condition and Canavert is ah Ganja-based treatment foh motion sickness. Ah made ah few calls to de Pharmacies about Canasol and Asmasol; is like ah was saying ah bad word! But ah proud ah me villager, Dr Lockhart. His dad was de Cocoa Propagation Officer whose colleagues called him de Cocoa Judge. But as ah youth every morning ah had to go by de Lockhart’s foh ah bottle ah fresh cow’s milk. Ah still picturing Albert and his cousin and uncle, Bully Robertson and Raymond Ferdinand, dressed foh Grammar School, waiting foh breakfast. Whle waiting foh de milk ah uses to pitch marbles wid Albert’s brother, Jim de biggest cheat in de village; dey were two younger siblings Ben and Kay, also doctors. Life is funny, all ah we drink fresh milk from de same cow and me ain’t come out ah doctor. Anyhow foh all Dr Albert do to Ms Marie Warner, he gets de Better Vision Awe-ward. Still in de I-man business, ah lickle country boy from Rose Bank won an Island schol, went and studied medicine, returned to his homeland and served poor people well at de inadequate Guv-ah-mint Hospital, performing free eye surgery keeping de nation’s eyes, including mine, open. Alas! de Cuban “20-20 vision” team came, and everybody behaved like if we never had ah specialist here doing de same eye surgery foh close to 30 years. He is now re-tyred, did anyone say thank yuh. Ah giving Dr. Junior Back-us de “Love Vine Total I-care Awe-ward”. Still pon de lickle poor boys and dem; ah went to primary school wid ah really poor one from Sion Hill whose best subject was drawing/art. In dat class we had three talented boys who played pan: Cyril “Big Bull” Simmons played foh Commandos, Winston “Ragga” Horne foh Melody Makers and Owen Ralph played tenor foh Crusaders. Owen de artist in de class mellowed into ah sign painter. Foh de last 35 years he has been de leader of ah (small) Mas Band: “ Owen Ralph and de Professionals”; he is de designer, wire-bender, moulder, everyting. Ah was over-joyed when ah went by Basils’ Art Gallery in Villa and saw on sale, some lovely paintings done by Owen. He now has close to 300 paintings at his own Art Gallery at Sion Hill, including several pieces suitable foh offices. Owen gets an Awe-ward foh Neglect”.

Ah notice Commonwealth Gold Medalist, Natasha Mayers meking noise over de US $1,000 ‘token of appreciation’ money dat de NAO gave her. Now based in de US, Mayers left hey ah tiny tot, never participated in an event in her homeland SVG, so she doesn’t overs de Billy Button system operating hey; is dozens ah Billy Button sports personnel who represented SVG foh years, at all levels, some lucky ones got scholarship, others ain’t even get ah thank yuh letter. Her adopted home, de US is de country she should represent if she expecting big bucks foh Re-ward. She gets de “Billy Button Awe-ward”! And like Natasha, Randy D, de grand-master on Radio, gets ah “Billy Button Awe-ward” foh marathon service to dis country in times ah disaster and Night Rider. Ian Sardine foh over de last 30 years, been coaching dem lickle toddlers up to national level; and Grant Connell who pioneering lawn tennis among de Grass Roots thru-out SVG, get de: “Love Vine Sports Personality Awe-ward”. Grudgingly ah have to give de GHS Past Student Association, de “All-Loom-Nigh Awe-ward” foh successfully organizing an unprecedented 12 months of activities leading up to its Centennial Celebrations. Did I say grudgingly? Yes as ah ex Grammar School boy, we had centennial too, but ours was just another assembly. De Lauders Processing Plant gets ah Quality Awe-ward foh manufacturing nicely processed and package local fruit products. Ah was about to nominate Commissioner Millar foh de “Pan Against Crime” Awe-ward. But during de heated elections, he either ran off or was sent off on leave, ah miss Millar in action, so he gets “de Miss- in Action Awe-ward”. Blazer’s PSC and not Vinlec gets de Few-ill Sur-Charge Awe-ward foh clapping 16 charges pon An-easier Baptist foh criticizing de Guv-ah-mint, dey think is ah battery dey charging! An-easier therefore gets de Love Vine Duracell Awe-Ward. And de Flicking Linger Chicken sorry, Finger Licking Chicken Awe-ward goes to de folks at de Hell’t Ministry who feasted on KFC (provided foh Cuban medics) and buss de vote. And de Love Vine’s Personality of de year Awe-ward goes to Dame Rene Baptiste. And wid dat is gone ah gone again. One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.