Don’t get lapped-up again

Ah don’t care who say dat ah backward, but ah refuse to get excited over our Prime Minister’s announcement dat President Socrates of Put-yuh-gal is giving us twenty-eight thousand Intel classmates Lapped-up, one foh every primary and secondary school child in SVG. Why didn’t our PM ask Mr. Socrates when he dump 28, 000 Lapped-up pon us and dey start ah give problems, who go repair dem.{{more}} And why didn’t he ask Socrates to put de assembly plant in SVG instead ah Venezuela or, why didn’t he suggest dat at least fifty ah we YES wukers be sent to Put-yuh-gal first, to be trained in servicing de Lapped-up. But 28, 000 Lapped-up, one foh every child is good pull-it-to-kill mileage foh Gonsalves, especially wid an election on his back, and Lie-Za polls got him way behind. Man every way yuh tun yuh will see ah Lapped-up, every primary and secondary school child, (some ain’t even got books yet), walking to school wid Lapped-up over dey shoulder like cell phone. What ah calamity!

Dey are certain questions dat waiting foh answers, like who will supervise de use ah dem Lapped-up? Wid hundreds ah Lapped-up in each school, who is going to service dem when school children start to damage and wreck dem? Would de classrooms be fitted wid Internet? Seems like every home will have to get Internet service. Next, who will pay dat Internet bill? This is beginning to look as mad as de people who pushing it! We need time to wuk out de mechanics as to how we go handle dis ting.

Maybe our PM needs to visit some ah de repair shops dat suppose to fix computers and T.V. and other electronics; when he sees de hundreds ah pieces ah dead equipment, den he would realize dat what we need is more young people trained to repair and service computers and electronic equipment. Lapped-up yes but not 28, 000.

BUMPY AND DILLINGER PROMOTED

When we entered Grammar School in 1955, Fred was de smallest and de youngest in de class, and he and Fr Sylvanus Regisford tossed up foh de brightest in Form 2B. Fred came up from Troumaca, having won ah Guv-ah-mint school. His older brother Bumpy was ah popular dispenser and island cricketer, and immediately Fred was renamed “Bumpy”. Dat Grammar School bond is strong and after we left school, though we never limed together, de way we greeted each other explained it all: I was “Zincke” and he remained “Bumpy”. He climbed thru de Public Service, did his professional Accountancy course in England, thereafter earning every promotion he got until he reached de esteemed and prestigious position of Director of Audit. Fred would have gotten his early training and nurturing under stalwarts like Hugh Hamlet, Saville Cummings, Beryl Baptiste, Clem Iton, Dennis Crichton, Moulton Williams to name ah few. Dey demselves were trained under de dreadful eyes of de Colonial Masters. Dat could explain why Fred was so fearless, so disciplined, and so forthright. Ah don’t think Sir James uses to look forward to de Director of Audit’s Report when Fred was Director.

Our Class Reunion in 2005 when we celebrated 50 years after entering school, took us all back to Form 2 and what ah week of fun ad laughter we had: Church Service wid Classmates Fr’s Ulric Jones and Regisford officiating; ah goat cook at Ferdie’s, ah night of bread and beef wid mauby and lime juice, reminiscent of de traditional House Feed; and ah Bar B-Q at Sam Commissiong’s. Fred and E.G. King were at every one ah dem function, it is remarkable how dat reunion healed all de ole classroom rivalry, fighting foh marks and placement; and foh de last five years all ah we were in touch again.

Seems like St Peter setting up an Audit/Accountancy Department. I was reminded dat Vin “Dillinger” Douglas, another stalwart public servant has left us. Like Fred, Dillinger came thru de Colonial pipe-line, he spent ah lot ah years around de Treasury and Revenue Dept. Just like Fred, he was fearless and forthright, ah no non-cents public officer. Ah great sport adjudicator, Vin could very well be de only person to have officiated at Netball, Football, Basketball and Cricket at ah national level. Ah never saw him on de dance floor, but ah hear he was ah Ballroom dancer. Lie-Za ask me if he uses to Bawl plenty when he dance. So wid St Peter’s Audit/Accountancy Office now opened, maybe de time is just right foh us to get our accounts checked and books audited, mek sure we slate clean.

And if de weather is right, Tuesday should bring ah lot ah Tri Tri. Tek note Ken John. And wid dat is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy.

P.S. Burton needs to “Ease de Jib” or spend some more time under Sir James’ wing again.

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.