dey’s ah bar on lovers’ lane

Ah want to Big Up de Headmistress ah de Girls’ High School, foh putting pen to paper and signing her name big and bowl, Andrea Bowman, to ah letter in which she raised serious concerns about ah Lick-her Bar dat is going to operate on “Lovers Lane”, dat’s next to de Murray Road Bus Stop way close to five hundred children does congregate after school. Is so much to be said about dah whole episode is shameful!{{more}} Ah overs dat “Groove Governor” is de owner, poor chap, he got set-up. He’s ah hard wuking far-dah who’s been trying to mek ah honest living over de years. Just reading his response to Mrs Bowman’s concern, he seems upset dat everybody running dey mouth and nobody ain’t gone to him to find out way he plan to do. Ah note all his plans foh Internet Café and so on, very good but ah Bar before and after school cannot be any thing else but ah Bar! Let’s not lead dem to temptation!

He go find it strange dat like de rest, me too running me mouth and ain’t check him either to find out way go down. Ah don’t have to, as ah Licensed Land Surveyor ah should know de Rules out ah me head.

Rule number one is dat de area along Murray Road is zoned as an Educational Block. Starting from de bottom including de Curriculum Unit, den C.W. Prescod Primary, Tommy Saunders Secondary, UWI School of continuing science, the new Documentation Centre and Public Library, Prep School, de Home-Ec Centre, Grammar School, GHS, close-by but outside de Zone up Mc Kie’s Hill yuh have de YWCA Pre school and finally Intermediate Secondary. We talking six schools wid nearly three thousand children circulating within one square mile radius.

Rule number two follows number one. If is ah school Zone, then it absolutely Bar,d from everyting, is like saying “night or day, dey’s ah Bar on Lovers Lane” , alcohol or not! And Groove is only one of several others who tried before him to get ah Bar going within dis block and got thrown off. Is just dah in Groove’s case Planning might ah bin intimidated by ah letter dat he got from ah Guv-ah-mint minister dat made him feel he had permission. Pull-it-tek-all enter-fear foh votes.

Rule number three, any body who intends to open ah Bar must apply to Physical Planning for permission. Planning in turn will publish dat application in de Newspapers inviting any objection from de public. Nothing like dat appeared on Groove’s behalf, which means dat Groove’s application didn’t even reach de Planning Board. What upsets me is dat Planning erred, Groove Governor should ah bin stopped politely, long before Mrs. Bowman cried Wolf foh real! But dah is how some departments operate, dah could ah never happen in ah department headed by Mrs. Fitz Patrick, our defiant and competent Accountant General. When our men turn Pyar Pyar, and coil de tail under de polly-trickans back-side, de women will tek de lead. Thank yuh Mrs. Bowman, and don’t tek it personal Groove, yuh and I have girl children in GHS, Mrs Bowman is only looking out foh us.

Lie-Za say she love de proposed name Groove Governor had foh de Block “Mahogany Lane”, how de present name “Lover’s Lane” is suggestive. Don’t knock our young people.

Ah tell her how “Mahogany Lane” reminds me of ah popular peddler in de 1940’s, who went aboard de British Warship wid ah bottle ah Cock-roaches, selling dem as Mahogany Birds. Ah penny ah pair. De sailors knowing what de insects were, sent him up to de captain’s bridge. All of ah sudden came ah voice on ah loud-speaker from de bridge : “Dis is de captain speaking, throw dat man and his Mahogany Birds over board”! Think we will put ah patent on de name, Bar any name change, ah Bar on Lover’s Lane!

WE BACK TO LABOUR DEY

In 1951 as was ah lickle youth when Joshua and Charles marched from George V Playing Field at Arnos Vale to Kingstown. Charles was de leader, he wore ah black suit, white gloves with Bible in one hand and sword in the other. “Hold de Fort for I am coming, Union men be strong” was de marching song. Trade union-is-him started at de peak, remained for ah while as leaders fought foh wukers Rights, and gradually dey sold out to de pull-it-tek-all directorates.

Can’t deny we had ah real Labour Day celebrations in 2001 when ULP took office, legislate May first and no other day as Labour Day. Guv-ah-mint pumped ah lot ah money to mek de celebrations possible, Dat was dubbed de first ever Labour Day in SVG. All de dead trade unions were resurrected, we even had ah doctors union, never before. Fancy nine years after, it is back to square one. Where are de leaders of dis Trade Union Civil-lies-say-shun, de Noel Jacksons, de Fitz Jones, de Lenford Weekes, isn’t it “ODD” dat these guys who mob-ah-lies de wukers to shut down de country in 2001, were influential in removing de NDP from office, today dey no where to be found, correction, dey was an auction sale, and Guv-ah-mint made one bid foh all ah dem, Sold sorry, Bought!! And wid dat, is gone ah gone again.

One Love Bassy

Bassy Alexander is a land surveyor, folklorist and social commentator.