My married uncle is dating my teacher. What should I do?

Hey Rosie,

I am a 15-year-old girl who just found out a nasty secret about my favourite uncle. My uncle is married with two children; one of them is in my class. We are a close family and get together very often. Well, Rosie, I found out my uncle is dating one of our teachers and her baby son is his child. I don’t think my cousin who is in class with me knows, but a family member of this teacher told me.{{more}} I feel so hurt and upset, I can’t even mention it to my mother, who is his sister. I can’t even look at him, because I am so angry. I can’t even concentrate in this teacher’s class either. I don’t know what to do; should I let the teacher know that I know? Should I tell my uncle? I really feel bad for my cousins.

I need help

Dear I need help,

Wow! This is almost a daytime drama and one that you really should not be involved in. I can’t say this enough – DO NOT become involved in this grown folks’ love triangle.

I really and truly wish that you never had this issue to deal with, but unfortunately you have been pulled in. But please know that this is not your battle; this is the bigger message that I am trying to stress to you.

I totally get that you are in an awkward position. I also realize that you are looking at your uncle through different eyes and you are rightly disappointed. However, you are getting an adult lesson at quite young age about infidelity, lies, and broken trust.

I wouldn’t approach the teacher (she has to deal with her truths herself); this is NOT your place. I wouldn’t even approach your uncle, because at the end of the day, he is an adult and you are a child, so overstepping your bounds to let him know that you are on to his “other life” is a no go also. So this leaves your mother; I’ve detected that you seem to have a good relationship with her and that’s why we have parents — to unburden our problems to them.

Speak to her about what you heard; let her know how much it upsets you; tell her how you feel about being in this teacher’s class; just be real about this issue that’s troubling you. Then, guess what? Walk away; leave this in your mother’s capable hands. At the end of the day, you are only a child; there is no need to be caught up any further in this drama. I know you are hurt and disappointed — especially for your cousins, but it isn’t your place to be the bearer of this horrible news. Again, please know that this is just a life lesson; we all make mistakes, so I hope you get some closure from this sticky situation.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or

P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St Vincent & the Grenadines.