I cheated on my bf with a liar; now I am pregnant for my bf

Hey Rosie,

I have been reading your articles in the SEARCHLIGHT newspaper and I would like some advice from you. I am 20 years old, female. I met my boyfriend last year July, after being single for nine months. All was going well until I heard a lot of things about him. Also, he used to flirt with some girls, whom his roommate told me about.{{more}}

I felt unloved and didn’t go about it the right way. In fact, I listened to a liar and talked to him and I had sex with him, because my boyfriend used to make me feel unwanted and unloved and said that it was over.

So I thought I was being used but I was being used by the other guy. I stopped talking to the guy and got back with my boyfriend and he heard what happened and I confessed to him. I am pregnant for my boyfriend now and its hard for me to gain back his trust. He wants us to work it out, but oftens he thinks about it and I feel bad about the situation. I know I am wrong for doing that, but I have learned and I am willing to give this my everything, but I don’t know what to do.

Frustrated

Dear Fustrated,

This is a mess indeed. You got caught in a web of deceit and lies and this is the sad result of total mistrust. The one thing I will say is that seeking to go about regaining your boyfriend’s trust is a good move. This type of rebuilding will NOT happen overnight, but once there are two willing parties, you do stand a strong chance to rectify this unfortunate situation.

Let me also say that this is a true life lesson about not being pulled into people’s deception and tricks. Men and women will always try to invade the space of another couple that they want to destroy. You will have to become very good at discernment, instead of depending on others for information. If you have doubts or questions, then you should either quietly observe what’s going on around you or ask your partner directly.

I can tell that you are regretting this mistake and to top it off you are pregnant. I really am pulling for the both of you to make it. I know he is hurt and feels betrayed (rightly so), but it seems like he loves you and that is a great base to rebuild from. Please go and seek counselling, I think it will go a long way towards helping you both regain the trust in this relationship. Remember you will have to take small steps together, but take the time to communicate your feelings, hopes and desires about where you are going. It will take a while, but I am hopeful for you both. All the best with the new little one that’s coming and remember we ALL make mistakes; it’s what we do with the lesson that matters.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or PO Box 152,

Kingstown, St Vincent & the Grenadines.