Hey Rosie!
August 6, 2010

Having sex is not a joke

Hey Rosie,

I’m 15-years-old and my boyfriend is 17 and he wants us to have sex. I love him so much Rosie, but I don’t want to do it with him because he has other girls on the side. He always denies it, but I know for a fact that he has other girls.{{more}} My cousin even says he has a baby in another village, so I really don’t trust him. But I don’t want him to leave me because of this. What should I do?

Don’t want to lose him.

Dear Don’t want to lose him,

NO! Is that clear enough? NO! What is clear to me is that you know this isn’t right, but you are still doubting yourself. You are very right. Having sex is not a joke, but a very, very serious decision that even grown adults can’t seem to make a sound decision about.

If your “inner voice” tells you don’t do something, follow that feeling; it is usually right. Why are you putting your self in this circle of drama anyway? He has other girls (your words), he may have a child! Really, do you need any other clues here? I’ll go one further step – leave this boy alone. You are 15 and he is 17, not a very big age gap, but it seems that he has already lived much more than you. That means he is more experienced and maybe able to manipulate you into doing things that you may not want to do.

You will be fine, trust me. At 15, the massive decision to have sex is not something on your “to-do” list. I feel as though you should be carefree and enjoying your life at this time. Pushing into high gear to finish school; by the way you sound like a very intelligent young lady and I have all confidence that there are some great things and people in your future.

Please ignore this pressure and stick to your guns. You aren’t in the market for sex at this time. Be safe. Be well.

Rosie

Send questions to Rosie at: heyrosie24@yahoo.com or P.O Box 152, Kingstown, St. Vincent & the Grenadines.