Hey Rosie!
May 21, 2010

Help, before I hit my wife a hard blow and end up in jail.

Hey Rosie,

How should I handle this situation? My wife comes home and all she talks about is this man who is so handsome and how any woman will be most fortunate to get that man. She keeps repeating this almost every day.{{more}}

Probably she loves that man more than me. Why, I ask, why can’t my wife talk about me, tell me how much she loves or cares for me. I do tell her such from time to time. Maybe I’m too cool in my dealings with her.

Am I overreacting? Any advice you have to offer me on this matter? I’ll be very grateful, Rosie. Please reply as soon as you are able to. I don’t want to end up giving my wife a hard blow and possibly ending up in jail. I’m getting really angry and frustrated!

Thank you, Rosie.

Hurt Husband

Dear Hurt Husband,

I, too, would be hurt if my partner came home and rambled on and on about his co-worker. In fact, I would be quite annoyed!

Your wife is not taking your feelings into consideration by highlighting that he is handsome and apparently the cat’s meow in her eyes. So I am with you there. However, I am truly curious as to why your wife is so intent on hurting your feelings. Is that what you meant about being very “cool” in dealing with her? Is she upset with you?

Do you remember to take the time to compliment your wife when she gets her hair done or is wearing a new outfit, for example? Or maybe she cooks your favorite meal and you not say “thank you?”. Or perhaps you are one of those men who likes to “look”? You know, stare down another woman in the presence of your wife? If any of these examples apply to you, then maybe this is where this behavior is coming from. She might be getting revenge, plain and simple.

No matter what, let’s try to re-direct this behavior on both sides. Focus on yourself first and figure out if there is anything that you could change about your behaviour.

Next, see if every time your wife comes home with this conversation it is soon after you have had a fight or maybe hurt her feelings. Finally, have a sit down with the wife and explain that you don’t like her talking about this man. Be honest and real, yet respectful, about how you feel. All isn’t lost here. I really do feel that there are some hurt feelings on both sides, and some neglect. Who knows, this may be the opportunity for YOU to become her knight in shinning armour. Good luck, and no blows, please!

Rosie

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